


Can you heal my pet? And by ‘can’, I mean do it or I’ll murder the town.

by waitineedaname



Category: Half-Life VR but the AI is Self-Aware - Fandom
Genre: Benrey and their ill-advised pet raccoon, Gen, No Plot/Plotless, Post-Canon, They/Them Pronouns for Benrey (Half-Life)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:28:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28660992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waitineedaname/pseuds/waitineedaname
Summary: “Wh-” Gordon blinked blearily at Benrey. A dozen responses floated around in his sleepy brain, including ‘it’s 2am, why are you at my house?’ and ‘I thought we’d put the whole murdering thing behind us’ but what his mouth finally settled on was, “What pet?”“My cat. She’s fucked up.” Benrey said, lifting the large cat carrier Gordon only just now realized they were carrying. He leaned over to peer inside against his better judgment and found himself face to face with a raccoon. Gordon stared at the raccoon. The raccoon stared back at him warily.
Relationships: Benrey & Gordon Freeman
Comments: 10
Kudos: 88





	Can you heal my pet? And by ‘can’, I mean do it or I’ll murder the town.

**Author's Note:**

> I could not for the life of me think of a title for this. this was another tumblr prompt! kinda plotless but it was over 1k and I thought it was cute so <3

“Can you heal my pet? And by ‘can’, I mean do it or I’ll murder the town.”

“Wh-” Gordon blinked blearily at Benrey. A dozen responses floated around in his sleepy brain, including ‘it’s 2am, why are you at my house?’ and ‘I thought we’d put the whole murdering thing behind us’ but what his mouth finally settled on was, “What pet?”

“My cat. She’s fucked up.” Benrey said, lifting the large cat carrier Gordon only just now realized they were carrying. He leaned over to peer inside against his better judgment and found himself face to face with a raccoon. Gordon stared at the raccoon. The raccoon stared back at him warily. 

“Benrey,” Gordon sighed, too tired to freak out like he might have in the middle of the day, “Where the hell did you get this?”

“Found her. She was a stray, eatin’ my, uh. Eatin’ my leftover pizza crusts in the trash. Adopt, don’t shop.” Benrey lifted the crate higher and poked their fingers through the door. "Brought her in. Been, uh. Been litter box training her. She's been good, but today she started acting weird. Throwing up and acting all sluggish. I dunno what's going on with her." 

Gordon stood up and pinched the bridge of his nose under his glasses. “Dude, that’s not a stray cat. You adopted a raccoon.”

“Whuh?” Benrey stared blankly at him. “So can you fix her?”

“Why would I be able to fix your raccoon?”

“I thought you were a doctor.”

“What? Dude, my doctorate is in physics, not medicine. Even if I was a doctor, you need a vet, not a doctor.”

“Huh? What’s the difference?”

“Doctors work on humans, vets work on animals.”

“Oh.” Benrey looked away from him and peered inside the crate again. His brain finally waking up, Gordon noticed an uncharacteristically concerned look on Benrey’s face as they looked at their ill-advised pet. Gordon’s resolve crumbled.

“Ugh, fine, come inside.” Gordon stepped away from the door and waved Benrey in. “I’ll call a wildlife clinic.”

They managed to find a wildlife hospital that was open 24/7, and after giving Gordon a minute to get changed out of his pajamas, they were bundled into his car and on the way to the clinic. Benrey kept a worried eye on their raccoon the whole drive, and they seemed apprehensive upon realizing their pet -- who Gordon discovered was named Banjo Kazooie -- would have to be taken out of their sight to be treated. Gordon reassured them that this was standard for most emergency vet treatments like this, which helped Benrey calm down a little bit, though they fidgeted nervously the whole time they sat in the waiting room. Gordon, on the other hand, had almost dozed off by the time the vet came back out and told them they could go see Kazooie.

Apparently, Benrey had bought cat food that contained some kind of ingredient that raccoons couldn’t process. The vet explained what raccoons should eat, and Benrey seemed to be doing their best to listen, but Gordon wasn’t really paying attention. He was far more interested in how cuddly Banjo Kazooie was being with Benrey now that she was no longer feeling sick from eating too much cat food. Had… Had Benrey seriously domesticated a raccoon?

Gordon offered to give Benrey a ride back to their place considering he had no idea how Benrey had gotten to his house in the first place, and he watched, mystified, as Benrey set the raccoon loose in their apartment. Banjo Kazooie walked around like she owned the place, and Gordon huffed out a tired laugh. 

“I didn’t realize you were a… cat person.” Gordon finally said, still keeping a wary eye on the raccoon. 

“Huh?” Benrey sent him a bewildered and pleased look. “Gordon assigned catboy?”

“What? Oh my god, no, no,” Gordon couldn’t help but laugh, “Dude you  _ know  _ that’s not what a cat person means.”

“Nya,” Benrey said, curling their hand next to their head. Gordon doubled over laughing.

“I hate you. So much,” He managed to wheeze out amidst his laughter. Benrey just smiled smugly down at him like they always did when they managed to get Gordon to laugh like there was no tomorrow. 

“Yo, uh,” Benrey coughed, their expression suddenly softening, “Thanks for fixing my cat.”

“Oh. Yeah, sure, no problem, man. I didn’t really do anything.” Gordon managed to collect himself enough to stand up straight and shrug.

“Drove me to the animal doctor. Stayed there with me.” Benrey popped their lips in an anxious, self-soothing stim. “Doctors can be… sucks. Thank you for being… not sucks.”

Gordon knew enough to read between the lines and take the compliment for what it was. He bonked their shoulders together gently and smiled. “You’re welcome, I guess. I’m always trying to not suck.” A yawn interrupted him before he could say more. “Fuck. Hey, will Kazooie bite me if I crash on your couch? I dunno if I can stay awake enough to drive home.”

“Whuh? Oh, yeah, hold up,” Benrey bent over and scooped the raccoon up in their arms, holding her like a sack of flour so she could face Gordon, “Banjo Kazooie, this is Gordon. Gordon, this is Banjo Kazooie.”

Gordon politely shook the raccoon’s little paw. “Nice to meet you,” He said, not sure what else to do.

“Don’t bite him, okay?” Benrey bounced the raccoon a little bit. “He’s a friend and you gotta ask before bitin’ friends and you haven’t unlocked human speak yet.”

Banjo Kazooie chattered gently and squirmed. 

“She said she won’t bite you if you promise not to eat her food,” Benrey said, putting her down on the ground to continue her waddling trek around the room.

“Do you speak raccoon? No, wait, don’t answer that. Sure, fine, whatever, I won’t eat her food.” Gordon shook his head, plopping down on the couch. “Nap time for Gordon.”

“Night, bro,” Benrey said despite it being late morning.

Gordon fell asleep on the couch to a quiet conversation of gentle Sweet Voice and raccoon chattering.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr @waitineedaname, say hi!


End file.
